McKerrin "They Plied Me With Liquor" Kelly


The fabled symbol of magical protection from occult forces, John Dee's Elder Sign just barely fits on this remarkably small garment. Keep things out; keep things in - the Elder Sign is right where you need it. Light, aerodynamic, and breathable, this is the mystical symbol that will keep the evil Things of the Mythos at bay without leaving panty lines on your clothes.

Click here to see artwork enlarged. Or click here for more information about where this Elder Sign came from. All ElderWear products come with a five page facsimile reproduction of the section of John Dee's Necronomicon which discusses the Omen Antiquitatum - the Elder Sign - and its use. Admitted, the good Dr. Dee never imagined this particular placement of his Elder Sign. Or did he?.

Artwork is John Dee's Omen Antiquitatum silk screened by our own specially trained shoggoths. The ElderThong is 100% cotton, made by American Apparel, right here in sweat-shop free conditions in sunny Los Angeles. Not sure what size you need? Click here for sizing. Due to the very personal nature of the ElderThong, we cannot and must not exchange them for another size once they have been tried on.

Please note, we're discontinuing our ElderWear line. The sizes in the pop-up menu below are the only sizes we have.



Not your style? We have men's ElderWear briefs and the women's ElderWear panties too!Want to hedge your bets with a real copper version of the Omen Antiquitatum? Get the HPLHS Occultist Edition or Collector's Edition now.

Warrantee, Occult Indemnification and Fine Print
In donning ElderWear, Wearer acknowledges that the Elder Sign is a potent magical symbol which manipulates cosmic forces completely beyond the understanding of mankind. Futher, wearer acknowledges that the Elder Sign is intended to be carefully consecrated and used in accordance with rules written by a mad Arab nearly 1400 years ago.Wearer of ElderWear understands that there is no Warranteee (implied or otherwise) that ElderWear will necessarily provide guaranteed protection against: supernatural infestation, demonic possession, ectoplasm, enchantments and/or ensorcelments, crabs, any kind of STD, or disappointing partners in relationships. Wearer of ElderWear agrees to hold HPLHS, Inc., its subsidiaries and officers free and blameless from any and all damages arising from occult and/or supernatural phenomena. That said, we are happy to take credit for any compliments, praise, catcalls or hot dates that may arise from the use of this product.